Bags aside, one of the greatest tricks for regaining your emotional and mental balance after a wobble or shock to the system/s is, at your earliest opportunity, to take yourself off alone and there sequestered away from the noisy world, give yourself a good out-loud loving talking-to – but do note, as the word loving connotes, there’s no telling yourself off allowed. You must strictly be only kind to yourself for such a chat to have its full benefit.
Now you may be harbouring the delusion that you don’t deserve kindness from yourself, that you’ve somehow got to earn it up front, which means you never get to collect because you’re always too busy in vain attempting to earn it – you may be harbouring that delusion but you’re no longer under any misconceived obligation to continue in that vain vein.
Therefore assume you are worthy of kindness – all the kindness in the universe – and begin by adopting the role of a super-loving, - wise and - approving aunt/uncle-type figure, that loves you unconditionally, can see you and all aspects of your life in full perspective, can clearly see what’s for your highest good and only wishes that upon you. Find the voice to fit the role and use it to talk to yourself in the second person.
Acknowledge how you’re in a state of shock, wobble or whatever state you’re in and reassure yourself balance and clarity will soon come back.
Tell yourself how well you’ve done getting to this point – how you overcame all previous shocks/wobbles with aplomb and will do so now again – no matter how bad or bleak things may momentarily look.
Then point out to yourself all the fine things there are about you: your courage, your fortitude, your discipline, your sweet nature, your generosity and so on and even if you think these may have been lacking, remind yourself you’re perfectly capable of increasing their amplitude in your person. In short give yourself the encouragement you fancy such a figure would give you in a real, live coaching session to get you back up and in the game again.
Don’t even bother thinking you’re insane for talking to yourself out loud like this. if you were talking out loud and saying nasty, self-diminishing things, then yes that would be insane, as to some extent it could be considered to be even talking aloud sweetly if out in public within earshot of others.
But talking kindly to yourself aloud in private is the very basis of sanity, so don’t be dissuaded by the old cliché it’s the first sign of madness – that’s just propaganda.
And then, just as you’d feel having had a good chat with an actual real life person, you’ll feel better in every way within no more than twenty minutes or however long it takes for all that positive thought-energy to penetrate to your deeper circuit-boards.
The effects of this technique can be accelerated by creating and using affirmations in a similar way.
Deep inner peace be suddenly yours.